If there’s one thing I know about myself, one thing I will never doubt and can always count on, it’s that I can’t keep a secret to save my life. If something occurs to me, or is told to me that I find incredible, my skull becomes a proximity mine that will explode information all over anyone who comes within 3 feet.

(While Proximity Mines were fun, I always preferred Pistols and License to Kill.)

Man, do I have a couple of whoppers in my brain. I can’t say anything this time, though. That makes this pretty rough. It may be best to sequester myself for a little while, or better yet, find something shiny to stare at so I’m occupied.

Sitting next to a window has never been more important.